The Virtue of Doubt
I don’t know to what extent those who have passed away can peer into the happenings of this present world.
Jesus does tell a parable of a man who could see into the earth and desired to send warning to his brothers, but I suspect his address was different than the Apostle Thomas! If Thomas can see our lives and hear our sermons, no question, there would be one word on his mind.
Doubting Thomas. I always felt guilty saying it. I identify with him, his reaction seems so human to me. He was in mourning for the loss of hope. Not just hope, but all hope. His Savior. Then, suddenly to be face to face with such a daunting promise again. I won’t believe it! I can’t stand to hope again if this is what losing feels like.
Unless… I can know, really know, beyond all doubt you are real.
We hide it like a unsightly scar, but doubt has purpose. It has virtue. It is a gift peculiar in creation to God’s children, it is the beginning of every invention and revolution. It is the seed that can nourish the concept of a better life. When doubt has merit, it can drive a man to research and dig, to abandon something he has been indoctrinated with, only to demand truth.
How better a world would it be if before any bomb was strapped to the chest of one with childlike faith, doubt would wash over them, to ask: “Is this what God desires?”
Every amazing testimony started with the presence of doubt. For Thomas, doubt became the catalyst for his pinnacle testimony and strength.
“I TOUCHED HIM. HE IS REAL.”
Christian faith is not a child-like faith. (THAT’S SO CLICHE.) Child-like faith allows you to enter the kingdom. But it is the assurance, the blessed assurance of a Christian who has had his faith rattled, but yet endured, that will keep you there.
David did not face Goliath with child-like faith. He had the faith of a man who felt God guide his hands in bloodshed before. A bear and lion would strike fear and doubt into anyone’s heart. But in this conquest, God took doubt and began to fashion a king.
If you have an abundance of doubt in your life, isn’t it possible God is trying to push you to dig deeper, ask more questions, find out in whom you believe. If it were not for doubt, America would not have the founding fathers we so vehemently adore, we would not have the heroes of faith, the pillars of the church and their testimonies.
I no longer have a child-like faith. However, I have scars. I have great testimonies. Stories of my failure, beauty for ashes, I have Christian faith.
Through this life of being a husband, father, and someone who wants to know God, I have cast my lot with Doubting Thomas countless times.
But would I be the Christian I am today had I not…I doubt it.
~Bobby Anderson, Washington, April 22, 2015